Christmas morning was spent with the kids and their dad at their house. My old house.
::sigh::
(shakes head) Moving on...
The morning went well and I came home about noon to be greeted at the door of my apartment complex by my downstairs neighbor who was cockeyed and on the fast track to hammered.
You gotta love that early morning buzz. I know I did.
She offered me a glass of wine. (no, I'm good, thanks.) Apparently the AA circle/triangle sticker on the back of my van must not have registered with her. Or maybe she recognized an alcoholic when she saw one. Yes, that must have been it.
There but for the grace of God....
Sunday, December 27, 2009
Saturday, December 19, 2009
one word answers
Steve E. presented me with this award. Thank you, Steve. Due to time constraints, I am unable to pass it on to others (linking takes forever!) But know that if you are on my blogroll, then I consider you deserving of this award.Where is your cell phone? Mantle
Your hair? Long
Your mother? Psychologist
Your father? Sculptor
Your favorite food? Sushi
Your dream last night? Forgotten
Your favorite drink? Water
Your dream/goal? Restaurant
What room are you in? Livingroom
Your hobby? Blogging
Your Fear? None
Where do you want to be in 6 years? Unknown
Where were you last night? – Meeting
Something that you aren’t? Mean
Muffins? Blueberry
Wish list item? Earrings
Where did you grow up? California
Last thing you did? Drove
What are you wearing? Clothes
Your TV? Off
Your pets? None
Friends? Yes
Your life? Normal
Your mood? Preoccupied
Missing someone? Yes
Vehicle? Van
Something you’re not wearing? Hat
Your favorite store? Taylor's
Your favorite color? Black
When was the last time you laughed? Yesterday
Last time you cried? Yesterday
One place that I go to over and over? AA
One person who emails me regularly? Steve
Favorite place to eat? White Light Diner
Thursday, December 17, 2009
it hurts worse when you're sober
Last night I ran into a bike rack that was hanging off the back of a SUV. With my face.
It was late. It was dark. I was trying to squeeze between two cars to get to my apartment.
I was not drunk.
My face looks hellish.
And I'm the lead tonight at our downtown Speaker Meeting. Good times.
This is exactly the kind of thing that use to happen to me when I was drinking. I remember a run-in with a thorny rose bush and my face back in '92 that did some serious damage to my eye. I was hammered.
It's funny, that for a blackout drinker, I always seemed to remember the mishaps.
Last night I chose not to go to the emergency room because I knew that I would probably be there all night and I wanted to get my sleep. I have a big day at work today and then the meeting tonight.
I'm praying that this gash doesn't leave a gnarly scar.
I have come to find that these mishaps hurt worse when you're sober. But the shot of pain is worth it when it's not followed by a shame chaser. No guilt and remorse with this flesh wound.
Bloggers, have a great Thursday.
It was late. It was dark. I was trying to squeeze between two cars to get to my apartment.
I was not drunk.
My face looks hellish.
And I'm the lead tonight at our downtown Speaker Meeting. Good times.
This is exactly the kind of thing that use to happen to me when I was drinking. I remember a run-in with a thorny rose bush and my face back in '92 that did some serious damage to my eye. I was hammered.
It's funny, that for a blackout drinker, I always seemed to remember the mishaps.
Last night I chose not to go to the emergency room because I knew that I would probably be there all night and I wanted to get my sleep. I have a big day at work today and then the meeting tonight.
I'm praying that this gash doesn't leave a gnarly scar.
I have come to find that these mishaps hurt worse when you're sober. But the shot of pain is worth it when it's not followed by a shame chaser. No guilt and remorse with this flesh wound.
Bloggers, have a great Thursday.
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Friday, December 11, 2009
strange needs to come to an end
I'm deeply sorry for inflicting my crazy ass jello-mold food obsession on you all. Even I couldn't tolerate looking at that post day in and day out for what? 6 days? Now, commenting on your crazy ass comments was a different animal all together...
Please accept my apologies in the form of something truly beautiful. I have posted on Eric. I have posted on John. Please give a round of applause for my combo post: Acoustical Eric and John.
I know. It's that good.
Please accept my apologies in the form of something truly beautiful. I have posted on Eric. I have posted on John. Please give a round of applause for my combo post: Acoustical Eric and John.
I know. It's that good.
Saturday, December 5, 2009
Thursday, December 3, 2009
from the podium
Yours truly will be the lead speaker on December 17th at our downtown Speaker Meeting.
What in the hell was I thinking when I agreed to this?
An auditorium full of people looking at me while I share my experience, strength, and hope? One hour of alcoholic and recovery goodness wrapped up in one little spiel?
Folks, my story is b-o-r-i-n-g. Boring, I tell ya.
J, who asked me to share, shares a similar situation in that he never drank in this town. I had told him that because my nightmare took place on the west coast, then conceivably, I could lie my ass off and spin a really good tale and no one would know the difference. He laughed, then said, "Nice try. But no." Of course I wouldn't do that; but the thought is appealing.
At what point did it become easier for me to hang out online and share with you all, as opposed to speaking at group level about my insanity?
(sigh)
I'm such an alcoholic.
What in the hell was I thinking when I agreed to this?
An auditorium full of people looking at me while I share my experience, strength, and hope? One hour of alcoholic and recovery goodness wrapped up in one little spiel?
Folks, my story is b-o-r-i-n-g. Boring, I tell ya.
J, who asked me to share, shares a similar situation in that he never drank in this town. I had told him that because my nightmare took place on the west coast, then conceivably, I could lie my ass off and spin a really good tale and no one would know the difference. He laughed, then said, "Nice try. But no." Of course I wouldn't do that; but the thought is appealing.
At what point did it become easier for me to hang out online and share with you all, as opposed to speaking at group level about my insanity?
(sigh)
I'm such an alcoholic.
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